$400,000 for 4 weeks of rehab?!

GM, GM. Bean Boy is finally back after a peaceful weekend. From a crypto addiction rehab centre for a measly price of 400k/month, to sending NFT’s down a black hole, and some updates from the drama last week, today’s edition has it all. Let’s see what’s in the pod for today.

How we looking today?

Same old, same old…

CRYPTO ADDICTION? WORRY NOT

Hi crypto degen, yes you, how has your recent trading been going? Too slow, or too many losses recently, that you feel like taking a break? Let me help you out with that, send me 400k and I’ll try my best. That pretty much sums up what Paracelsus Recovery in Zurich offers to those that can afford shaving 400,000 USD off their portfolio. A four-week program for crypto addiction within this rehab centre in Switzerland offers services like a chauffeur in a Bentley, a private chef & maid, two separate suites, 24-hour live-in therapist, and a tailored program (including: diet plan, acupuncture, yoga and medication). If you told me about this ‘service’ off topic I would have thought it was Jordan Belfort on one of his ‘getaways'.

Did I mention that this centre doesn’t require their patients to hand in their devices… So theoretically you could continue degening your portfolio away whilst living in luxury, hmm sounds a lot like a cash grab.

Moving along, according to the CEO of the centre, one ‘client,’ they really coming up with fancy terms for degens, lost 10M which was a large portion of funds he got from selling his company. This guy got liqd 10M and the first thing he thought of was to lose another 400k ??? Anyways, Paracelsus treats crypto addiction like a gambling addiction, I mean for 99% of people it is gambling whilst pretending it’s ‘investing', but they don’t make it mandatory to remove devices off people ? This just sounds more and more like a tax write off for those top % 1 that want’s to have a cheaper holiday. Regardless, its pointless to argue about this because it’s not like I can afford to get treated here anytime soon.

ALL NFT HOLDER’S WORST NIGHTMARE

Imagine losing ~150k USD in one click… Unfortunately, for the ‘holder’, that isn’t really the holder anymore, of Cryptopunk #685, this was his reality. NFT collector Brandon Riley, sent his Cryptopunk which he had acquired for 77 ETH (135k at the time), to a burn address whilst attempting to ‘wrap’ his crypto punk. To those that may not know, a burn address is an address which has no owner, thus, there is no way of interacting with any assets within that wallet. Anyways, Brandon wanted to wrap his punk so he could use it as collateral and borrow some ETH in return for his crypto endeavours, but obviously this didn’t go the way he imagined.

Now, in order to wrap a Cryptopunks you need to interact with the Ethereum smart contract of the Cryptopunks and make your own proxy wallet as there isn’t any UI or frontend tools to do this for you. After making your own proxy wallet, you can send your unwrapped Cryptopunk to it, and then mint a wrapped one through a different contract. Doesn’t sound tooo bad, right?… The exact steps from the official site is shown below.

Brandon made the mistake of not generating his own proxy wallet and instead sent his precious Cryptopunk to the ‘default’ proxy wallet which is just the burn address. This is honestly a mistake many people could make, especially those that don’t have much experience interacting with smart contracts. I feel for you Brandon 😭, I’ve also lost the seed phrase to a wallet which had a lot of money in it before… like $2 worth? After the whole incident was tweeted out Brandon got the support of many users, alongside the upwards confirmation of a better tool to wrap Cryptopunks. Also, many people think that this isn’t a big blow for Brandon because, ‘if you can afford a punk, you’re well off.’ According to Brandon himself he got the punk through borrowed money, double ouch, cmon Larvalabs, make this a first and last case.

DO KWON & EULER FINANCE UPDATE

This is it, not the update that you might’ve wanted, but it’s definitely needed. If you’re not caught up with the drama behind Do Kwon and Euler Finance, make sure to catch up on our previous editions!

Following his arrest, the US didn’t waste any time with the man, charging Do Kwon with:

• Conspiracy to defraud

• Commodities fraud x2

• Securities fraud x2

• Wire fraud x2

• Market manipulation

As of this moment, there hasn’t been any announcements on where he’s going to be extradited to, it’s either the US or South Korea, hopefully both places treats him like the criminal he is. On top of this, the Montenegrin court extended his detention time to 30 days when it’s usually 3 days, due to high probability of him attempting to escape. Surprisingly, a legal representative of Do Kwon is attempting to appeal this decision. The man doesn’t know when to give up, does he?

Now, for the final nail to the coffin for this Euler Finance story. To sum it up, looks like the exploiter and Euler Finance came to a resolution and the exploiter has been returning majority of the funds.

As of this moment the exploiter returned 51,000 ETH in one transaction to the Euler deployer address and four separate transactions worth 7,738 ETH each to four different wallets, which is believed to belong to the team. Looks like what we were saying finally happened. Maybe the exploiter read our edition? Who knows, but I’m glad Euler got majority of their funds and looks like the exploiter came out richer than before from all of this. Farewell, good ser.

PEAS IN THE POD

• Terra co-founder in S.Korean crosshairs following Do Kwon arrest. It’s all over buddy, better start running.

• Titanium Blockchain CEO behind BARs ICO fraud, put behind bars for 4 years. So many arrests, its getting hard to keep count!

• First Citizens to buy Silicon Valley Bridge Bank’s $72 billion in assets at a discount of $16.5 billion. Bro, what a play from these guys. Lucky mfs…

• $4M ‘exit scam’ suspected as Kokomo Finance flies off radar, token plunges. Hey Siri, play ‘another one meme’ by DJ Khalid.

HOW YOU BEAN - A READERS CONFESSION

After trading crypto and NFTs for the last two years, I’ve become someone that I don’t recognize. With multiple losses and gains, I feel empty and nothing really feels like it matters anymore. It’s just numbers on a screen and I’m betting every day trying to make it go up… maybe I’m not fit for this market.

To be featured in ‘HOW YOU BEAN’ please email: [email protected]

PEE-PEA OF THE DAY

DISCLAIMER: None of this is financial advice. This newsletter is strictly educational and is not investment advice or a solicitation to buy or sell any assets or to make any financial decisions. Please be careful and do your own research.